I Last Posted A Year Ago Tonight

I reread the entire blog, short-lived, like my pregnancy…after weeks of trying to figure out what to do, I’d decided to wait until after the genetic testing was done to make a decision about an abortion. I didn’t make it that far. On February 10th, I miscarried. It honestly broke my heart.

I still don’t know that I could have continued the pregnancy if I’d found out that the baby was going to be born ill or with genetic defects…

Almost a year later I wonder what my child would have been like, a boy or a girl? Out-going or shy?

I went through months of debating with myself if having the miscarriage is what triggered an intense desire to have another baby, or whether it was only hormones? What I do know was that I was SEVERLY depressed for six months and I only now feel like I am thinking like I did before my pregnancy.